Sunday, September 24, 2017

That Impure Object of Desire?

Though quite innocent Betty appears
She shows skin when on set she premieres
The censor says, "Gracious!
Immensely salacious!
She's beginning to get lots of leers!"

David Cairns

Betty Boop excites The Old Man of the Mountain (Dave Fleischer;1933).

Friday, September 22, 2017


This guy's a deplorable sneak
He despises those more of a freak
This ganef and ghoul
To the monster is cruel
No surprise Fritz's fortunes are bleak.

In Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931), Fritz (Dwight Frye) taunts the Monster (Boris Karloff) with a torch. Limerick lexicon: ganef = thief. It's Dwight Frye-Day at LimerWrecks.

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Against the Grains

Within reach, a bare limb is like candy
Skin beseeching a him to get randy
Then the facts intervene
Showing cracks in the scene
On the beach, and in swimsuits, it's sandy.

Chester Morris and Carole Lombard are Sinners in the Sun (Alexander Hall; 1932).

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

No Good Time Goes Unpunished

Just like juries, film plots must obey
Laws ensuring the rotten cliché   
In Virtue v. Sin
The church gets to win
Impure, flapper hotties must pay.

Dorothy Sebastian, Joan Crawford, and Anita Page in Our Dancing Daughters (Harry Beaumont;1928). Title by good for nothing Donald B. Benson.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Nick and Noway

The facts of life cannot be stated
So alternate means are created.
If a lady expects,
She didn't have sex
But was artfully insinuated.

Donald B. Benson

After the Thin Man (W.S. Van Dyke; 1936) closes with Nick asking Nora why she is knitting booties. “And you call yourself a detective…”

Monday, September 18, 2017

The Medium Was the Menace


When naughtiness reached a crescendo,
Both up front and by innuendo,
The censoring boards
Protected us hordes
Till cable, the net, and Nintendo.

Donald B. Benson

Joan Blondell and Dick Powell in Convention City (Archie Mayo; 1933)--a notoriously racy film, now apparently lost.

Sunday, September 17, 2017

From Boop to Nuts

Her garter she'd flash, to amaze
All hearts filled with passion, ablaze
This flapper cartoon
Would happily croon                                                                        
Till the tart had her clash with Will Hays.

David Cairns


Over the years, Betty Boop's garter changed styles as well as legs, and her cartoons changed from risqué to tame, the latter due to influence of the Motion Picture Production Code of 1930, aka the Hays Code after censor Will Hays.

Friday, September 15, 2017

Don't Look Then

Could Dwight see the byway ahead?
That nightmarish highway of dread?
That soon all his roles
Would be loonies and trolls
Did it frighten the guy to drop dead?

Dwight Frye as Renfield, on the road to the castle of Dracula (Todd Browning; 1931). On November 7, 1943, Frye died of a heart attack while riding on a bus in Hollywood.

Thursday, September 14, 2017

He's Too Darn...Not

Patsy's beau doesn't cotton she's there,
So this show at a rotten cad's lair.
He's sick (morning after).
She quickly grows dafter.
Still it's no, the poor sot doesn't care.

Donald B. Benson

Marion Davies and Lawrence Gray in The Patsy (King Vidor; 1928). From Donald: "Davies has schemed for the hero to burst in, rescue her from a playboy, and realize he loves her. But aforementioned playboy is enduring a hangover, so she tries -- and fails -- to rouse him with impressions of three current sirens, Mae Murray, Pola Negri, and Lillian Gish (above)."

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Holy Unlock

The hero, who sure wasn't choosy
Gets married to pure-looking floozy.
A proper divorce?
Too sinful, of course.
It's lucky the floozy is boozy

Donald B. Benson

Dorothy Sebastian and Anita Page in Our Dancing Daughters (Harry Beaumont; 1928). Says Donald, "Evil Anita Page steals Johnny Mack Brown from pretending-to-be-fast Joan Crawford. SPOILER: The villainess then conveniently gets drunk and takes a header down a stairway to clear way for happy ending."

Tuesday, September 12, 2017


Her raciness draws 'em like flies.
Disgraceful, her flapperesque guise.
When called on her bluff,
She hollers, "Enough!
This face is a front to please guys!"

Donald B. Benson

Mr. Benson writes, "A rich young man (Neil Hamilton) tests a poor girl's virtue in Why Be Good? (William A. Seiter; 1929) -- as in many other films. But instead of the usual melodrama, Colleen Moore rips into him with an angry lecture on how girls HAVE to play sexy."                 
Here at LimerWrecks, we LOVE Colleen Moore.

Monday, September 11, 2017

Holy It

This shop girl is good, but ambitious
And maybe a bit too delicious.
Mistaken for bad,
She still gets her lad
When cleared in a manner propitious.

Donald B. Benson

Clara Bow and Antonio Moreno in "It" (Clarence G. Badger, Josef von Sternberg; 1927). Says Mr. Benson: Clara Bow targets a rich young man, but he thinks she's an unwed mother (her roommate has a baby; her marital status is kept fuzzy). Happy ending aside, it's implied unwed motherhood WOULD disqualify her from respectable marriage.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

From Max to Minimum

Unlike some cartoon ignoramus,
We tykes preferred Fleischer to Famous.
The latter were meager
Too flat, and no Segar
No Ike era grownup could blame us.

Donald B. Benson

From Donald Benson: "Discerning baby boomer kids quickly learned that the vintage Max Fleischer Popeyes were far and away superior to the later toons from Famous Studios."